Archive for May 2014

From Belly Mommy To Birth Mother

Emme has always known that she has a Belly Mommy in Ethiopia and a that I am her Heart Mommy. For the past 4 1/2 years we have little chats that stayed within the simplicity of that explanation. Until a few days ago. I listened as my five year old asked the questions that have been asked before, and then witnessed her heart break as she realized the loss that she had so early in her life.

For an hour and a half we talked, cried and held each other. Together our hearts anguished. This was the first time as her Mommy that I truly could not “make it better”. I listened to myself as I told her that some things in life are sad, and it is ok to be sad about this. I shared with her the sad thing in my life, my infertility. I also told her that we never would of found each other if that sadness had not been a part of my life. This entire conversation felt to mature for a five year old, yet I consciously made a choice to be very open, honest and real with her.

We sat there at the end picking up the pieces of reality around us. I shared with Emme that there was one more step that we can do to try to find her Birth Mother, and that I as her Mommy will do my best to find her.

This is why I am coming back to this blog. Emme’s journey is not over. I will journal it for her so one day she have it as her own.

Emme does not call her Belly Mommy anymore, she calls her Birth Mother.

It is not lost on me that this occurred a week before Mothers Day.

THIS…….is for Emme’s heart.


1 comment May 9, 2014






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